I told him I was late because
when I woke this morning
everything in my apartment
had been stolen and replaced
with exact replicas
and when I told my sister
she said, who are you?
He asked me what skills I had
I told him I did abstract paintings
no paint, brushes or canvas
but I did buy some second-hand paint
in the shape of a house.
I told him I got on with colleagues
I'd just asked the typist out
but she said if I had sex with her
and she found out I'd be in trouble.
He asked me if I was married
I told him I was divorced
we'd split the house fifty-fifty
she got the inside.
He asked me lots of questions.
I didn't get the job.